Why are you messy?

Compartir : Facebook Twitter Whatsapp

Everything is out there, you cannot tidy up, so much so that your house quickly turns into a mess. Why so much mess?

An office full of paperwork, cabinets where dirty clothes are piled up. Blame it on a hectic pace of life where you always lack time to order. This excuse is the one that invokes a lot of disorder. Yes, but it is not just about that.

Disorder, a certain way of asserting

The disorder can also reflect a profound inability to bring order to life. Or a rather egocentric refusal to take charge: the disorderly person always more or less expects others to come after him, as his parents did.

Be careful, some of these messes are only apparent: everyone knows these "messes" who know exactly where their things are, in which pile of paperwork they can extract the last memo. Let them start ordering, and they will not find anything else. The kind disorder that surrounds these messy people has something creative about it and in a way it wants to say to others: "I do things my way!"

I am messy, why do not I want to be ordered? It is no coincidence that messy people have often been messy since adolescence: the time of rebellions, rejection of instructions and above all of trial and error to find - and impose - a way of being good for oneself, which is not dictated by parents or society.

Disorder as a way out

Does this mean that the deranged have not passed this stage of their adolescence? That their disorder testifies to a remnant of revolt? Or, on the contrary, has this disorder crept into their lives due to an excess of social control, first from the outside, then internalized to the point of suffocating them? Disorder would then be a kind of escape, a safety valve.

Finally, lets be honest, sometimes clutter is just the apparent manifestation of another trait: laziness.

When clutter becomes a problem

The first victim of disorder is usually the disorder itself: lost transportation due to lost tickets, unfulfilled schedules that lead to difficulties at work. The disorderly person knows that his way of operating puts him in danger, all his attempts at organization fail. In this case, the disorder rather testifies to a difficulty in overcoming anxieties, and it is not useless to ask oneself, if possible with the help of a professional, about this disorder, which is only a pretext for causing failure.

Do not impose yourself at the expense of others

The disorder in the house, when you live with your family or as a couple, under the pretext of asserting your freedom, ends up invading that of others who are invaded by the objects of disorder. When clutter becomes a way to assert yourself in front of others, or to reduce your living space, clutter says a lot about latent and deeper problems. And clutter runs the risk of being pushed out by a simple defensive reaction from those around it.

What if order is also a problem?

On the contrary, the maniacs of order are rather in an obsessive process that cannot be considered positive.

In terms of personality, this can betray a psycho-rigid tendency and an inability to question oneself.

In pathological terms, the search for dominance betrayed by "mania" reflects a state of anxiety that one tries to control by acting on objects. But it can take on exaggerated proportions and reflect unhealthy anxiety that can lead to social phobia or obsessive-compulsive disorder.

Compartir : Facebook Twitter Whatsapp